Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
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My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
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Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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