We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize