Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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