At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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