Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize