matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
