Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
