I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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