God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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