But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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