Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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