Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
