Pappa wants mamma naked
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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