Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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