Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize