She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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