Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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