Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
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its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
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She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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