WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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