Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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