i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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