id be glad to
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
