Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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