marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Randomize
