Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Randomize
