would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize