Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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