idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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