that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
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