I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize
