he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize