Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
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