My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
