sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize