Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize