Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
