And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
