I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize