I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
