at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
