dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
