Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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