I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
