I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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