i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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