at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
We are two peas in an std pod
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Randomize
