im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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