Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize