glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
