Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
